College Admission Essays

College Admission Essays :

Jason Garber – Hutchinson - Kansas

A natural entrepreneur and computer whiz, Jason combined the two to start a computer-related business at the age of 14. Through his business, he has sold and serviced computer hardware and software, developed and hosted websites and provided computer training. At Hutchinson High School, Jason was also involved in the choir, band and as president of the National Honor Society. In writing his essay Jason went through many drafts. “I just kept tweaking, revising and having others read it for quality, content and clarity,” he says.

More Than a Tutor - Eastern Mennonite University

Being known as a computer tutor for the elderly hasn’t won me many dates—at least not with women under 60. It has, however, brought me in contact with a generation of people who have a lifetime of wisdom and experience to share.

I enjoy tutoring a great deal because it allows me to interact with individuals more personally than one managing his own business is typically able. Through it, I gain a window into their lives and the things that have shaped their personalities. One of my favorite examples of this is an 81-year-old widow who has determinately used her computer to enrich others’ lives, despite the barriers her health puts forth.

Nearly every Saturday, at 10 o’clock, I arrive at her home. She welcomes me in, immediately beginning to tell me about the triumphs and tribulations of her week. On Monday, she went to the dentist, and now she can’t seem to suck her milkshake through a straw. Then, on Wednesday, her dishwasher of 15 years went out and made a terrible mess all over the floor... Quite often, we can spend a half hour or more discussing the events of our respective lives.

After some time, our conversation segues into my excuse for visiting: tutoring her on the computer. She takes out a list of questions and tells me the things that she wants special help with as I sit down on the wicker bench beside her. We address each item—making greeting cards for sick friends, sending e-mail to her son, chatting with her sister in Wisconsin, searching for recipes on the Internet—but frequently digress whenever we want to share something amusing.

When she has absorbed as much as she cares to, she glances up at the clock and echoes the advice I gave to her after our fi rst meeting. “Well, I’ll play with it,” she says, intending to spend some time in the next week trying out her newfound abilities.

Before I leave, she often needs a jar opened, a top shelf reached or a melon cut. As we progress toward the door, we continue talking, neither of us wanting to end our reunion. At last, I must tear myself away, and my grandma of sorts watches from the window as I drive away, already beginning to miss my company.

On my way home, I’m filled with thoughts of what her life was like when season Packers tickets cost $12, when she stood before the class and recited her arithmetic and when her late husband, the judge, found homes for orphans and did widows’ taxes for a dollar. As I turn into my garage, I recognize with a smile that through our relationship, I’ve given her comfort and company and received a little more wisdom and understanding to tackle the challenges of the week ahead.

Why This Essay Succeeded

There’s something heartwarming and memorable about Jason’s essay, the way he takes the time to converse with, assist and perhaps most importantly, appreciate, this senior citizen widow. This essay helps Jason to set himself apart from other applicants by showing this detailed level of respect and compassion. On top of that, Jason has the maturity to appreciate and really take to heart what the senior shares with him. The admission officers can tell that he is the type of person who is very insightful and self-reflective. In any essay you want to present a few of your best personal qualities.

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