Once up a time there were three cows. Daddy cow (also known as a bull), Mummy cow and Baby cow. They lived in a field beside another field that was used as a car park.
The cows did not do very much, all they did was eat grass and chew the cud.
“I’m bored," Baby cow said one day.
“Here the farmer has left the gate open," Mummy cow said.
The three cows looked at each other. They could go into the next field that was full of cars.
“Shhh," said Daddy cow (also known as a bull). “Let’s go in and see what’s what.
There’s nobody about."
The three cows wandered into the neighboring field and looked about. There were lots of cars. They had seen people get in and out of them and drive them about.
“I want a shot." Baby cow said.
“OK son," said Daddy cow (also known as a bull), “You go and see if you can get in one."
Baby cow walked around the car-park, he tried the handles of all the cars until he
found one that opened. He used his hoof to open the door and crawled into the
“Hey look I’m driving a car," he said as he turned the wheel. “Look."
“Very good son," Mummy cow said. “I bet I can get right round the car-park without touching the ground.
“How are you going to do that?" Daddy cow (also known as a bull) asked.
“By jumping from one car to another." Mummy cow replied.
“OK, I’ll time you."
“How are you going to do that?"
Mummy cow walked over to the nearest car. “Ready," she shouted.
“On your marks, get set, GO." Then Mummy cow jumped onto the first car and then leaving hoof prints on the bonnet jumped onto the next car leaving a nice cloven-hoofed imprint. She managed to get onto the fifth car before falling onto the ground."
“That was fun," she said. “how did I do?"
“Three." Replied Daddy cow (also known as a bull).
“Three is that all?"
“Well yes, I don’t know what comes after three, so that’s all you managed."
“Right your turn?" I’ll count for you.
So Daddy cow (also known as a bull) jumped onto the first car leaving an even bigger hoof print to the one already there and started jumping from one car to the next.
“Hey look this puts some lights on," Baby cow said as he found the lights. Then he found the windscreen wipers. “What are these for?"
“They’re in case your windscreen gets muddy." Mummy cow said, forgetting about her counting. “Look I’ll put some mud on them for you." She then proceeded to kick some mud onto the front of the car. The wipers started to squeak and bend as they struggled to wipe away the mud until they broke.
“Hey, you’re supposed to be timing me." Daddy cow (also known as a bull) shouted as he slipped off a car.
“Three," Mummy cow shouted. “So it’s a draw."
“Hey look someone is coming." Baby cow shouted.
“Quick scarper, back into our field," Daddy cow (also known as a bull) bellowed.
The three cows then ran back into their field. Mummy cow caught the gate with a
hoof and pulled it shut just as some people walked back into the car park.
The three cows looked at each other and watched as the people walked up and down and scratched their heads. One or two of them looked at the cows and pointed at them and then pointed to the hoof prints on the cars.
The three cows just looked back chewing their cud as cows do.